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Dakotah's Journal



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5 entries this month
 

True Blood

20:20 Jul 29 2013
Times Read: 1,193


Who smiled when the Governor got his head torn off? Still debating if I like this season. I still don't know what to make of it - whether its really good, or in the middle of shark jumping.



I also think werewolves would be more interesting if one vampire could not just rofl rape them.


COMMENTS

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17:06 Jul 27 2013
Times Read: 1,212


Playing Skyrim a bandit spots me and says "Gonna slit your belly like an old woman's purs-Guah!" gets killed by a trap, made me giggle like school girl.


COMMENTS

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verrewulf
verrewulf
18:46 Jul 27 2013

The best thing I have ever seen in that game is a bandit threatening me and neither me or the NPC realized how close we were to a giants' camp and a giant steps up behind him and launches him into Nordic space. :D





 

'Vampire' graves unearthed in Poland

22:06 Jul 23 2013
Times Read: 1,230


I always wondered what it would be like to live back in "those" days. After reading this, not so much now. They seemed so 'off with the head' happy.



A quote:



Unlike the classic Bram Stoker image of a caped, blood-sucking aristocrat, the definition of a vampire in the Middle Ages was far broader. Even people who abided by old pagan customs and left food on the graves of dead relatives could fall foul of accusations of vampirism, and suffer a prompt execution.



http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/world/2013/07/13/newser-vampire-skeletons-poland/2514461/



This one has apicture of one of the skulls with the rock in the mouth:



http://www.livescience.com/38148-vampire-grave-uncovered-vampire-burial.html


COMMENTS

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Days Passing/ Good Bye My Brother

12:03 Jul 19 2013
Times Read: 1,281


This weekend it will be one week since one of my best friends died. Looking back this week I need to thank you all who have been there for me. It's been hard. It has been surreal. The major pangs of loss are still there when I think about him or visit his obituary site.



I hope they keep it up for awhile. Reading what ever one post helps. I called him Tuari/(which I always misspell) Jon. His real name was John Thomson.



John was old enough to be my father. But he was so into Native Lifestyles that some how our roles reversed. I was his Elder and he was like a son. He was so eager for knowledge and soaked up everything I said. He loved the old stories and he would ask me endless questions. I never claim to know it all and I introduced him to some true Elders. He embraced the customs.



We all played/play a game together. In this game we have a community. It is pure Native and we all work very hard on making it as close to traditional as possible. John was a very active part of this community. Even towards the end when he was so weak he would still come play. For awhile he was not sick. He was fine and he could just be. We all knew he was dying but in this world he was not and we would not give him any slack. If he messed up I get onto him. Though he hardly ever messed up.



Sometimes forgetting about all life's real pressure can be a positive thing. I think as long as there is a balance and someone does not dive into fantasy to a point there real life suffers/ then it can be ok. I know for John the last months when he would play it really helped him and I truly believe it even extended his time with us.



The last time John was online was a few days before he died. I was so happy to see him. I shouted "Tuari!" he shouted back "Nah!" "Jon!" and his "Sean!" We laughed. He managed to stay on for an hour. His daughter was sitting by his side in his bed, helping him to hold up his laptop. For that hour everything was ok. That last hour is forever embedding into my mind.



That was to be the last time I would see my friend alive. But I am glad my last memories of him were laughter, talking, calling each other brothers. He was proud to wear his native Gear. In his heart and in my heart John is a native brother just as much as my real life brothers are. I know John will forever be on the Red Road and one day I will join him on the Spirit Walk and he will be there to greet me.



John also got to attend a real Pow Wow given by REAL Tribal Elders from many nations before he died. He was in awe the whole time.



We honored John by dressing him in native Burial robes. I had the honor to be with his family in dressing his body. We put eagle feathers in his hair/ which feathers are very sacred.



Thank you John for the wonderful experience you gave me and the honor to be your teacher. However, you taught me way more then I ever taught you.










COMMENTS

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Saetan
Saetan
15:53 Jul 19 2013

I am sorry for your loss, had no idea at all what was going on. *hugs*





 

To Jon- My Friend Always

07:46 Jul 15 2013
Times Read: 1,354


Jon was a good friend of mine. He contacted an infection in his blood. He was in ICU awhile. They were able to get control of the infection but it left a lot of his major organs weak. I knew this. All his friends and family knew it. Looking back now I see how you (you as used in general, I , me, we, us) do not wrap your mind around that this person in your life is dying.



Jon was very weak his past few months and we would all log on a game together online and play. In this world his body was not weak. We rode horses together. We fought as warriors side by side. He even had a love interest. Her name was Crystal. Few weeks ago they wanted to get married in this game. Jon and Crystal asked me if I would perform it.



We began to plan there wedding. The day of the wedding Jon had a bad day. He could not sit up enough so I told him lets postpone it. I could tell he was glad I made this choice for him because he did not want to let Crystal down.



Next few weeks we did not talk about it. He would just say Sean lets play! And we all would log in and play together. There was/are 38 of us all playing together. One day though he tells me he wants to talk to me in private. Away from everyone else. I say sure.



Jon begins to tell me what he would like for me to do to hold a memorial for him in the game. I copied and pasted his every word. What he wanted. When he was done telling me, he gave me a hug. He thanked me.



See Jon is a real life friend and also online friend. I know his real life family and his online family. This week I have to do his online memorial and also attend his real life funeral which his family wants me to be a part of it. I am still part numb. I hope I can do this without breaking down.



The memorial in world won't be as hard. No one will see me crying as I do the service. The one out of the game will be the hardest. I am hoping I can keep it together while I am up there.



This journal entry is for me. To get my thoughts out. To see them. To read the words that Jon is gone. That this morning he died. It hurts. He was a best friend. In my mind we will always be in that game, riding horses together, fighting side by side, laughing and having fun.



This is what he wants me do at his funeral to his friends and family. Now see why I do not know if I can keep it together:





I give you this one thought to keep --

I am with you still – I do not sleep.

I am a thousand winds that blow,

I am the diamond glints on snow,

I am the sunlight on ripened grain,

I am the gentle autumn rain.

When you awaken in the morning’s hush,

I am the swift, uplifting rush

of quiet birds in circled flight.

I am the soft stars that shine at night.

Do not think of me as gone –

I am with you still – in each new dawn.





How does one hold it together for something like this? I am so afraid I won't be able too.


COMMENTS

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ScheayaRaven
ScheayaRaven
08:10 Jul 15 2013

It is so hard when you feel like there is an empty spot in your heart and in the universe. But then you feel that they are with you...a bond in spirit that will never die. It is like a soul bond that you can feel no matter where you are. If you can't hold it together it shows the love as friends and family that you had for one another. I am so sorry for your loss.





thundara
thundara
08:11 Jul 15 2013

Your strong in heart and soul , nobody expects anymore if you than what's possible .... This is a hard time for you having to deal with the loss of a close friend ..... One bit of advice I can give to you which worked for me , think of one single time , a time when you both laughed so much it hurt / one single day that meant so much to you both and keep a tight hold of that memory and smile when you bring it to mind ..... Just picture him laughing and being happy , I'm so sorry for your loss hunni . X





queenofthedamned2
queenofthedamned2
08:21 Jul 15 2013

I am very sorry for your loss dear , I know it is hard on you but try to be strong he would have wanted you to. and hes not suffering anymore he feels no more pain, hes not gone you still have a best friend because in you heart and memory he will always live on and be with you.





EstrangedOne
EstrangedOne
08:29 Jul 15 2013

Your friend Jon sounds like the kind of friend who deserves not a candle lit in his honor, but a torch, instead.

I feel no sorrow for the lost, myself. But I know when it hits a person, it hits harder than the backlash of a hurricane wind, in an enclosed corridor.

Just remember that when a person passes, leat they have something thwy are endlessly guilty of, they are brought throufh to the next world. Especially if in the eyes of one person, they can be considered a Saint. At least, that is what I believe for most. There are some who are beyond any redemption, such as myself. But it only gives me more reason to make the attempt to help others, since I know I am 'lost', anyhow.



Remain strong, my young Blood Brother.





Dakotah
Dakotah
08:36 Jul 15 2013

I am printing out all the advise to keep with me and take with me to the funeral. Thank you all so much. I have never been a part of a funeral before and as I said I am terrified I will loose it up there. All your advise thank you so much. It helps. I am going to read it over and over and the day of his funeral I will have it with me.



Sean





hannahrose
hannahrose
09:19 Jul 15 2013

IT IS OK TO CRY AND THE GREATEST THING YOU CAN DO IS SHOW YOUR LOVE COMPASSION AND SPEAK FROM YOUR HEART. EVEN THOUGH HE HAS PASSED HOME TO SPIRIT HE WILL STILL BE AROUND YOU AND LOVE NEVER DIES. YOU GUYS REALLY LOVED EACH OTHER AND ONE DAY YOU WILL MEET AGAIN. IT IS NOT GOODYE FOREVER DAKOTA, IT IS GOODNIGHT SEE YOU IN THE MORNING. HE KNOWS YOU LOVE HIM AND ALL YOU CAN DO IS TRY YOUR BEST AND EVEN IF YOU CRY IT SHOWS YOU LOVED,RESPECTED HIM AND ARE MISSING AND GRIEVING FOR HIM. I AM SO VERY SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS AND ANYTIME YOU NEED SUPPORT OR A FRIEND TO TALK TO I AM HERE FOR YOU, AND IF I CAN HELP WITH ANYTHING ALL YOU GOTTA DO IS ASK .




Dakotah
Dakotah
11:08 Jul 15 2013

Hanna, thank you for spending the night with me and sharing with me. It has indeed helped me get though these past few hours. You told me it was ok to cry. I cried. You told me it was ok to feel the loss. I feel it. The death poems, the journeying most important. Jon was afraid he would not know which way and your wisdom know will help us to help him know the way and to let go of his body. The Elders said the words would come to us when we are all ready to hear them. This is how Jon wanted it. I may be hitting you up again for the placement on the candles. We have the permits to do it since we all knew. So all the legal aspect is covered. His body was not embalmed. His body will feed to Mother Earth as the journeying takes place.



Thank you all for the messages you have sent me too of support and advise. I knew I did have a lot of friends here. I hope I can always return what you have given me tonight back 100 fold to be there for you all too.



Sean.





VictoriaRose
VictoriaRose
13:39 Jul 15 2013

I have lost my best friend and I know how hard it is. The poem is beautiful. There is no comforting words that I can give. Try to stay as strong as you can and when you break just know he understands.

I wish you peace Dakotah..





Dakotah
Dakotah
12:40 Jul 16 2013

Service is 7/17/2013 3 PDT.








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